The day has come. I am sharing my secret with all...why I am so attractive. It is because of these pick up lines below. Beware, they are nerdy (but 100% effective!).

(The truth: I found them online...no secret...same level of attractiveness)


I just noticed you were missing a valence electron from across the room. Did I mention my name was sodium?

You know why we should let time approach infinity? Because d = v * t, and I want to go all the way with you.

Is the room shrinking? Because you're getting hotter by the second!

Looking at you made my jaw go from V(0) to V(terminal) in miliseconds.

Hey babe, I was going to measure the spring constant of my bed tonight and I could, you know, use an assistant. If you know what I mean. ;) (We could make some forced oscillations.)

Are you cos^2(x)? Because I'm sin^2(x) and together we are one.

Baby, we must be a sine wave, because we're always oscillating.

I wish I could be your derivative so I could be tangent to your curves.

My attraction to you is an inversed square law.

Could I get your signifigant digits?

You've got my mind going in circular motion!

Nice blouse. But it would look even better accelerating at 9.8 m/s^2 toward my bedroom floor.

I wish I was your integral so I could be the area under your curves.

01101001 00100000 01101100 01101111 01110110 01100101 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101

You're more special than relativity. =)

If you wanna learn about simple harmonic motion, I can always teach you...

In our circuit of love, there is no resistance, only capacitance.

You and me, that's grand unification right there.

Wow you're pretty. You must be a Mac!

We're moving pretty fast, this situation has some momentum!

Are you the square root of 2? Because my love for you is irrational!

Hey babe. What's your resonance frequency?

I think we're on the same wavelength, so who cares if we're going a little fast, as long as it's constructive.

Just looking at you turns my software into hardware.

Heisenberg was wrong. I know exactly where you'll be tonight. *stalkerish*

I've got so much pent-up potential energy. Wanna help me convert it into... kinetic energy?

It's so hot in here. Is it global warming, or is it you?

Hey babe, wanna see the exponential growth of my natural log?

I wish you were my problem set, 'cause then you'd be hard, and I'd be doing you on my desk... or on my bed... or in the library...

You're so hot you make my unit vector go from j to k and dilate all the way.

Love is a matter of Chemistry,
Sex is a matter of Physics.

If our love was of the form a + bi, b would be zero 'cause we keep it real.

Math is the basis of everything.
Applied math is physics.
Applied physics is chemistry.
Applied chemistry is biology.
Applied biology is fun. =D

Why don't we measure the coefficient of kinetic friction between you and me?

I wish I were your second derivative so that I could investigate your concavities.

If I were an enzyme, I would be DNA helicase so that I could unzip your genes.

If I was chlorophyll a, you'd be the sun, because you excite my electrons.

Are you 2x? Because I want to integrate you from 10 to 13!

My love for you is like a concave up function because it is always increasing.

How 'bout you and me go back to my place and form a covalent bond? (*with* a dipole moment =D )

You and I would add up better than a Riemann Sum.

You're sweeter than fructose.

You're hotter than a bunsen burner set to full power!

You know what they say about men with big hard drives don't you?

You can put a trojan on my hard drive anytime...

I want to see the area under YOUR curve.

If I were to say /hold hand, would I get the response /slap?

Can my substrate bind with your active site, or are you allosterically inhibited?

Wow...you're a strong nucleophile and I love your back-side attack..

I wish I were Adenine so I could be paired with U.

If i was an endoplasmic reticulum, how would you want me: smooth or rough?

You know.. it's not the length of the vector that counts... it's how you apply the force.

You compute me.

By visually measuring the wrinkles in the front of your pants, calculating your body mass based on your height and weight, and dividing that number by your waist size -- I conclude that you have absolutely nothing in your pocket and are, in fact, glad to see me.

Do you think we can make it a step more serious and disable network sharing?

Baby, you are as mysterious as the random reboot problems I'm having with my Linux server!

Would you like to share my bandwidth? I have a really fat pipeline.

I 1-sin(theta) you.

If you and I were the ideal gas law equation (PV = nRT), how would my pressure and volume affect your temperature?

Put your golgi body next to mine!

I wish we were vectors so I could put my head to your tail.

Your love is sweeter than 3.141592656...

Your chest is just like crystal: a rigid, geometrical structure.

You must be gravity, baby, because you're the only thing keeping me here.

I must be trippin' because only acid rain could show me a hallucination as gorgeous as you.

Are your pants being entropically unfavorable, or are you just happy to see me?

Hey baby, what's your activation energy? 'cause I bet I could catalyse my way across those curves ;-)

Forget Microsoft, I'm Macrohard.

How many concurrent users can you handle?

I wish I were the derivative of your natural logarithm so I could be the one over U.

If I were an enzyme, I'd be DNA integrase so I could put myself in your genes!

If *I* were making the periodic table of elements, I'd put Uranium and Iodine together.

Are the stars out tonight? 'Cause you have one heavenly body.

I wanna react to completion with you.

I'd like to look at you through a telescope so I can check out your celestial body.

Baby, I know my chemistry, and you've got one significant figure.

I wish I could be the Patriot Act so I could violate your privacy.

Let me equal awesome, and you equal awesome. Then if you go into me, we become one!

I'm so emo, because I know I'll never get to touch your asymptote.

Hi. I'm an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus.

Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package

My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in

I wish I was a viral vector so I could transduct my material onto you.

You must be a lanthanide because you are definitely a rare earth element.

You are an alkali metal because you are reactive to my salt-forming halogens.

I think you would like my amps divided by volts.

Can you be my other bonding pair so you can bend my molecular geometry 105 degrees?

I wish I was Columbus so I could explore your virgin island.

Can you help me prove Lamarck's theory of use and disuse? *points to pelvic region*

In chem we learn Dimensional Analysis. So can I analyze your dimensions?

So the Biot-Savart equation says to the solenoid: "That's not your Poynting vector, that's my wife!"

I hear you're an electron. Allow me to introduce myself: My name is fluorine.

Hey are you singular? 'Cause if so, together we could be plural. ;)

You can come into my proteasome, if you've got some Ubiquitone to bind to my protein lid.

I wish we were doing vector addition so we could go head-to-tail.

Forget dipole-dipole attractions; I feel we have an ionic bond!

You're so cool, I've got to measure you in Kelvin.

If I were a neurotransmitter, I would be dopamine so I could activate your reward pathway.

Hey baby, SN1 or SN2 attack? If he knows his organic chemistry, then he'll choose SN2 and release his electrons from the backside.

Hey baby, you and I should form a carbon-carbon double bond so I can oxidate your cleavage.

If you were a sterically hindered substrate, I wouldn't mind, I want to be closer to you.